fresh.

Fresh and New. Fresh and new. fresh and new. (capitals make me crazy…and commas,…,…,…,)

April blog. New theme.  

In December, I decided I was going to create an online course every month. I also chose themes for each month based on the first thought I had about the time of year. 

I like ‘fresh and new’. 

When I was facilitating weekly social and emotional lessons to elementary classrooms, I often repeated the phrase, ‘any moment you choose you can begin again – fresh and new’. I’d add – ‘and you can do it over and over again’. Other sprouted sayings included, ‘every moment is a fresh start, a new beginning’, or ‘every ending is a new beginning’. 

I’m sure I read or heard someone else say these things first, in some context relevant to me at the time…they resonated…they stuck. 

More recently, I hear myself often say in meetings about students who may have learning differences in the school setting, or have difficulty regulating themselves in (what I would call) a non-preferred setting, I hear myself repeating a script: ‘the brain works in cycles, beginning-middle-end, just like a day or a breath…students with learning differences often don’t complete things – they don’t finish the cycle, and it creates a discomfort…a disconnect.’

Okay – so yes, if you are home schooling that concept is easy to apply – finish. Visual plan: first, next, then. Paint a picture (verbal working memory) of what ‘done’ or expected outcomes/behaviors look like, feel like, sound like. The saying ‘don’t bite off more than you can chew’ is relevant here. Set yourself up to finish the cycle.

This blog is about self-care.

Cycles. Seasons. Springtime. Fresh and new. beginning/middle/end. Every ending is a new beginning. Any moment I choose is a fresh start, a new beginning.

All of these resonate with our experience. Real time.

I often share unsolicited advice about what I consider to be the best ‘1-2 punch’ when it comes to regulating your inside world. 

1. Find breath in your body. Slow down. Expand your lowest spaces (hip bones expand, back of ribs grow – these are new favorite cues for me…I like the experience/sensation of it, and it’s different – so when you focus on these areas expanding, the focus gets out of your mind space…creating space away from the obtrusive thoughts). 

2. Self-talk. Talk to yourself in a way that is encouraging…loving. Also, having your own ‘go-to’ short scripts is so helpful because they become your new habit. A certain feeling shows up and instead of it cueing thoughts that match, or feed, the feeling, you meet it with support/encouragement that raises your state/mood and navigates you back to balance.

When our view of the world is external, we falsely believe that others are responsible for encouraging us, or the ones responsible to soothe the discomfort – same as we assume others are responsible for the uncomfortable feelings in the first place. 

Never true.

Self-care is practicing skills, tools, and strategies that return you to well-being…balance. 

The last thing I would like to share is a thought about the inside world. I have several connections to ‘inside world’ that I use in lessons. I also often speak of the cellular world – which is ultimately what the inside (and outside) world is made of. Cells have three main functions – integrity, balance, and fluidity. Not to mention, cells are always replicating themselves so they are always fresh and new.

Integrity. In tact. Truth. Your truth. YOUR dreams, goals, desires. Balance. Enough. You can’t NOT be enough. When you believe you are less than this, you are entertaining a belief that is contrary to truth. It will never feel good. Fluidity. Change. Flow. Adaptive. Flexible. Allow.

You are a badass who is functioning at a cellular level – fundamental to your existence is integrity, balance, and fluidity. It’s the function of all existence. It’s never missing. We just get out of sync. Attunement – attune to your natural state of wholeness. Why? It feels good. And then what? You feel good. Does it matter what happens next?