An astrologist told me that because I was born under a new moon phase that I had the ability to see all sides.
An emergenetics profile told me that I like to connect the dots no matter how far apart.
Googling ‘universal laws’ gave me language for something that is so easy to observe – the law of polarity. Everything exists within oppositional forces.
7 habits showed me a formula: practices must be aligned with paradigms and paradigms must be aligned with principles, or universal laws.
Children are sages. When you spend your days with many children you learn a lot by observing. I often observe the potential power differential between myself and a child…and what a fine balance this needs to be. I also often observe my stress response, or emotional elevator as we call it at school.
Power differential. Stress response. Chicken. Egg.
When I assume that my trajectory of ideas holds the most power, I unintentionally create a power struggle when my idea (or my plan) isn’t in sync with the child’s interest or ideas…my assumed power is now challenged.
Does anything trigger a stress response more than the feeling of powerlessness?
A conversation with a behavior analyst in our school district taught me ‘when one cannot predict another’s behavior it evokes fear’.
fear = stress response
A student that spent a lot of time in the hallway last school year had a standard response when asked why he was in the hallway…’because I can’.
As it relates to a school setting, can you consider in this example the power differential (remember, this is a fine balance when it comes to keeping children safe) combined with the stress response…
Can you see how this response (‘because I can’) could…get a response?
And then what?
It’s funny when one engages in their own stress response (ie. at school = write a referral! call home! tell the teacher/principal!)…it can seem satisfying when reacting…but then what? what really shifts and contributes to growth?
I wanted to post this blog because I actually found myself using the phrase ‘because I can’ throughout the summer.
Flip the context within the lens of self-care…it’s a great mantra. Why are you not doing anything? because I can! Why are you going to two yoga classes today? because I can! Why do you not capitalize the beginning of every sentence? because I can!
the leader in me
the leader is in me
I lead my thinking
because I can
A fun, relevant excerpt from a novel I’m reading…written in a child’s narrative…
…but this is a common problem with adults: they ask for the impossible and then make your life a misery when you can’t obey them…