“lose your inhibitions”
“take off the edge”
“she/he/they are uninhibited”
Let’s wrap this month of examining the executive skill to inhibit, by wondering about the possible social norming of ‘appropriate’ inhibitions.
There may be a potentially unexamined social narrative encouraging the inhibition of certain behaviors. Social behaviors can include topics of conversation, sharing unpopular feelings, sharing a difference of opinion, sharing inquiring thoughts. An unexamined code of how to politely interact with one another.
There may also be a conditioned hierarchy of social power that may have everything to do with money and acquisition. Watching any ‘royalty’ show can demonstrate very clear levels of worth and importance. These social structures, when examined, can include a broader understanding of the origins of caste and race. Examining the origins aids in understanding current implementation of social policies that created, and sustain, social imbalance: access to adequate employment, education, healthcare, and housing.
Being the observer, being the witness, being the noticer (OWN) of your inside world of Feelings, Impulses, Thoughts, Sensations (FITS), can expand your day to day experience by disrupting social inhibitions that when unexamined could be unintentionally supporting hierachies of social power.
This can happen when we orient our behavior choices (actions or inactions) to make others happy. This can happen when we orient unexamined beliefs that we are born into planet earth to make others happy FIRST. Others of whom we may arbitrarily place in positions of power.
Sweet spots all over the place. I may be inserting a lot of personal beliefs. (#myblog) The intended outcome from a self-care lens is to examine personal assumptions of social power and how we may limit ourselves by ‘trying’ to live up to unexamined standards we assume others in positions of power (we define this) are setting that reflect our value and worth.
stay with me.
When we become the examiner of our inside world we align and resonate with a sense of balance and equilibrium, wellbeing. When we orient from this space our inhibitions are more genuine, more attuned to our truth of how we want to show up and express ourself.
Service to others is a natural outpouring of goodness. It feels good to genuinely validate another’s experience and want good things for the other from a sense of mutuality, shared humanity, or the popular win-win attitude.
Simon Sinek’s book The Infinite Game (which I haven’t finished) does a good job (I think) of delineating between finite games (ex. football) and the infinite game of humanity where win-win is the ultimate win. Win-win is really a mindset, an energetic state of equilibrium. A state that intuitively transfers to wanting for others what you want for yourself, which is most likely some version of freedom and possibility. The opposite of this could be an (unexamined) mindset of which aquisition and wealth will win YOU freedom and possibility, and then the split energy of fear and doubt making it seem like the ‘other’ could take it away from you at any time – a finite amount of goodness that is acquired or earned.
What do healthy inhibitions look like, feel like, sound like (?)
Am I depending on (_________) to be my truest self? why?
Here is a suggestion for self-care. If you enjoy _________ to take the ‘edge’ off, see if you can practice settling your inside world first. OWN the present moment: witness the FITS, name them. And then do what you were going to do.
What does it feel like to enjoy yourself, to enjoy ‘other’, to enjoy an experience – situation, circumstance, event.
What does the pure essence of enjoyment feel like? how does it show up in your mind space, heart space, belly space, muscles, skin? (ie. the nervous system response)
(enjoyment lives in the state of equilibrium. this is a regulated state. this is natural. enjoy yourself. it ripples. it trends.)
What does an ability to inhibit mean to you?
What story do you tell about impulse control?
What does it mean to release one’s inhibitions?