day. a sensual lifestyle brand created by sally seiffer 

I love sensuality.  To me, sensuality is a clear desk. As I type, to only have what’s necessary on the desk. It’s also knowing that the rest of the space is cleaned up with things put away (‘everything has its place’ – or get rid of it, is a general ‘rule’ for me). At this time I have a book, two piles, my notebook with a book on top and another book next to it. But, it’s also early morning on a Sunday and I just sat in my other space for an hour in the quiet. I have a candle lit (yesterday was the first time it was cold enough to light a candle in my otherwise quite warm-in-the-summer apartment). I have the lights dimmed the way I like it. And I have a full mug of ‘coffee’ (mudwtr cacao). This is my experience of what I refer to as sensuality. The environment is intentionally cued to support what my physical senses seem to enjoy most. If I can create enjoyable space most of the day, that contributes to a good ‘day’. ‘Good’ days have a way of growing momentum. 

It wasn’t always like this. And, it’s not often ‘all put away’. I have made great growth in simplifying my life to set me up for success as it relates to the environments I spend the most time in. My digital environment is my next thing to tackle. It’s a mess.  

In my book, abetterway. using inner resources to create your own algorithm, I talk about my personal experience in understanding what my executive functions are, and how to use them intentionally to plan desired outcomes in day. One phrase I used often when I worked with younger students, but one that resonates with all ages, is a version of: how to get out ahead of potential obstacles. 

It’s the intentional undoing of unhelpful patterns and a belief that it’s the ‘obstacles’ fault. 

It’s the noticing of the daily narrative that is on repeat, and choosing to stop the nonsense and disrupt its cyclical nature to overcast ‘same’.

The book that I have yet to read in its entirety, but think I understand by title, seemingly verified by several listens to podcast interviews of the author, seems to describe this absurdity of the unhelpful ‘hamster wheel’ effect: Atomic Habits by James Clear. 

When one notices the unhelpful pattern, one can disrupt the pattern and begin to move (oftentimes incrementally) toward desired outcomes in a sustainable, lasting way.

What I have seemed to uncover in my own experience, it’s the most simple things that make the biggest difference and contribute to enjoying one’s experience ‘most’ of the time. 

The sensual. Asking: Where am I in space and time? What am I looking at? What do I prefer to look at? What are the sounds I hear? What are preferred sounds? How much control do I have in moving toward what I prefer? Can I improve it? What are preferred tastes? Why? Can I control this aspect of day? Some of the time? What am I wearing? Where am I sitting/standing/laying – am I comfortable? Smells? What do I notice? What do I prefer? What control do I have? What story am I telling about what I am experiencing? Is the story helpful? Can I change it? Why?

If day is a constant exchange of energy and information that is best organized in a meaningful way, the experience of the physical senses and one’s story told about their experience is interacting with one’s intelligent nervous system. If the dominant story is one of fear, the response is safety and protection; if the story is one of possibility, now life feels a bit more playful and intentional – as if there’s a co-creating aspect to it.

I’m personally working on pitching my own content and figuring out my next book titled: Quiet Time. 8 steps to more creativity, possibility, and inspiration. It’s a narrative of the checkIN tool – my first ‘thing’.

The Story I Tell. How to Make the Age of Disruption work for you. is also available on Amazon Books, as well as Something More. Connecting to the pulse of a Shared Humanity.

The checkIN tool includes skills, tools, strategies from part III storyitell.